Stan Smith uses his CIA skills to help 13-year-old son Steve win class president and the heart of the hottest girl in class, Lisa Silver. But when being class president makes Steve mad with power, Stan must jump in to save the day. Meanwhile, Roger, the alien Stan saved from Area 51, helps 18-year-old Hayley with her school paper. In return, she hooks him up with boatloads of junk food to curb his sweet tooth. Unfortunately, some Chocodiles send him over the edge and a sugar crash prohibits him from finishing one of her papers, forcing Hayley to pick up the pieces. And Klaus, the goldfish with the brain of a German guy, pines after mother Francine. Unfortunately for Klaus, the closest he'll ever get to a date with her is the spin cycle with her sports bra.

Stan Smith is mad because after getting his wife a job (or "hobby") as a Real Estate agent, she makes more money than him. In the meantime, his daughter Hayley ran a program that helped the homeless, and Stan's son Steve had an idea to have a Bum Fight program. To get back and to try to gain more money than his wife, Stan takes Steve's idea and starts a Bum Fight Night where he takes bets and treats the homeless like wrestlers. But with the homeless petition, Stan has to end up fighting like a homeless man himself.

Hayley comes home from a Green Party rally with her hair dyed green, instigating a fight with Stan. While she's sleeping, Stan cuts her hair (for her own good, of course). After learning of what Stan did, a wigged Hayley defies her father yet again by moving into the van of her new boyfriend. When Stan cuts her off financially, she gets a job as a waitress in a strip club, which pushes Stan right off the edge. Meanwhile, Steve tries to pass Roger off as his disfigured sister in order to cop a feel with a female classmate.

When Stan forgets his anniversary, he arranges to have 20 hours of Francine's memory erased, but the CIA temp on duty accidentally erases 20 years. Francine, having reverted to her wild child days, moves into her old apartment with Hayley as a roommate, and ends up going to a festival with Hayley's boyfriend. Meanwhile, Steve asks a good-looking girl out, but needs his wingman, Roger, to "jump on a grenade" for him and date her ugly cousin.

Stan invites his boss over for dinner, but the Smith family fears getting caught hiding Roger. After a close-call, Roger goes into a coma, making everyone thinking he's dead. After the family disposes of his body, Roger tries to get back home, but he ends up in another risky situation with the CIA.

Francine decides to throw a block party to get in touch with the neighborhood. Stan learns his new neighbors are Iranian and immediately suspects that they are terrorists. To prepare Steve for living near terrorists, Stan makes Steve join a group of scouts, who turn out to be trouble makers. Roger is convinced he possesses hidden alien powers and is determined to find out what they are.

Stan goes to great lengths to compete against his rival, Chuck White, and become the new deacon of their church. Meanwhile, Roger's "temporary problem," which Stan tries to use to his advantage, causes all sorts of problems for Steve, Betsy, the rest of the family, and eventually, Stan.

Stan finds Deputy Director Bullock, his supervisor, starting a relationship with Hayley. However, he can't risk saying or doing anything about it because he's up for a promotion at the CIA. Meanwhile, Steve finds Dick Cheney's BlackBerry and uses the contact numbers to play pranks on political figures from around the world.

When Steve brings home a permission slip to take sex ed at school, Stan flips out and demands to teach it himself. However, after Stan unrealistically explains the birds and the bees to Steve, he gets into an accident that causes him to take matters into his own hands. Meanwhile, Roger becomes a bartender in hopes of making something of himself.

When the CIA organizes a father-son baseball game, Stan is determined to show his co-workers that his son is masculine and athletic. Unfortunately, Steve is a geek, so Stan decides to lie and ditches him. But after getting a taste of his own treatment at work, Stan turns to Steve and his sci-fi knowledge to help capture a cyber-terrorist. Meanwhile, Roger goes incognito in a desperate attempt to interact with humans.

When Stan's father passes away, Stan reveals his real father is actually Jack Smith, a super suave spy. Jack convinces Stan to quit the CIA and work with him at the Scarlet Alliance, an ultra-secret spy group. Francine is upset with Stan, who is busy training with Jack for a mission involving uranium, artwork and terrorists. But when the FBI shows up at the Smiths' house looking for an international jewel thief, Francine suspects Jack is the fake.

Stan has to throw a party for his boss and assumes his wife Francine will do all the work, but she refuses. With Stan as party planner, the event turns into a disaster. As a result, Stan's boss relocates Stan and his family to Saudi Arabia, where they quickly get a taste of life on foreign ground. As American and Arabian social norms clash, gender wars heat up.

As the Smiths continue to live in Saudi Arabia, Stan is fully enjoying the male-dominated society, while the rest of the family struggles with the different social norms. Meanwhile, Francine's musical expos on gender roles gets her into trouble, and a brush with death leads the Smiths to return to the United States.

Francine insists that Stan and Hayley spend an entire day together, after their arguments drive her crazy, so they can work out their differences about gun control. However, her plan backfires when he takes Hayley to the "National Gun Association Land," where their conflicting opinions about gun control drive them even further apart. Back home, Roger schemes to get revenge on Steve for eating one of his cookies by convincing him that he's adopted.

Steve becomes a famous author, and the entire family gets caught up in his celebrity, including Stan, who becomes an unbearable "stage parent." After Steve hooks up with an agent, he abandons his family to lead a "Cribs" lifestyle.

As Stan continues to dominate the household, Francine finds herself idolizing a group of women who seem to have it all. She tries to impress them and even lies in order to gain acceptance into their group, until she realizes they aren't as perfect as they seem. Meanwhile, loyalties are tested when Stan gets a new best friend.

After Stan and Roger have a rough day, they get into a fight that leads to a "Freaky Friday"-type switcheroo where they get a taste of life in each other's shoes. But after the excitement of a new life stales, they face each other's problems as Roger is under pressure at work and Stan yearns to be needed. The swap gets out of hand as the family starts to crumble.

After receiving a hefty bonus from work, Stan buys extravagant gadgets while Francine pleads for her dream kiosk. Upset about his lack of support, Francine opens a muffin shop without his approval and gives Stan a taste of life without a housewife. In a desperate move, Stan puts Klaus' brain back into a human body – only to discover it was a huge mistake as Klaus tries to win over Francine. Meanwhile, Steve is convinced he's a teen wolf after watching a horror film.

Because of a past incident at his own prom, where he was lured into a dance with the homecoming queen only to have a pile of pigs dropped on him, Stan wants revenge by showing off that he married a homecoming queen, Francine. A proud Stan accompanies Francine to her reunion, but when they find out that two ballots were lost and that Francine didn’t actually win the crown, Stan is devastated. Meanwhile, a dejected Steve is “saved” by a pizza delivery man with a Messianic message.

When Stan goes to Atlantic City for a bachelor party and is shunned by his so-called best friend, Roger steps in and becomes Stan's new sidekick. Their friendship goes to a whole new level, but when they return home and face Francine, Stan realizes that what happens in Atlantic City doesn't necessarily stay there. Meanwhile, Hayley and Steve team up to break up a good-looking couple.

Stan wants Steve to be popular and goes to desperate measures giving him steroids to make him bigger, better, and part of the in-crowd at school. But when the steroids have an unexpected side effect, Steve gets a lot more attention than anyone expected. Meanwhile, after Hayley makes a movie about Francine's life as a housewife, Francine is determined to start a new career as a doctor.

After Steve shows a lack of interest in Stan's job, Stan replaces him with Barry, Steve's malicious friend. Barry frames Steve to eliminate him from the household, but when Steve discovers Barry's weakness, he relies on his CIA skills to save the family. Meanwhile, Roger takes an impressive keg-stand and uses it to become a fraternity brother.

When Francine's birthday brings back haunting memories of a celebrity film moment stolen by George Clooney, Francine's new dream is to destroy the star. But when she tries to win Clooney's heart with the intention of breaking it, Stan actually falls for him and sabotages the plan. Meanwhile, back at home, Roger builds a vineyard and starts up a private sweat shop of foster children.

When Stan tries to trick Steve into attending summer camp, things go horribly wrong and Steve ends up in a refugee camp. However, Stan, being the eternal optimist, joins Steve and manages to stage a camp Olympics between the refugees and the rebel faction living across the river.

Stan realizes his own weight problem after he criticizes Steve about his new, overweight girlfriend, so he goes overboard with exercising, and develops anorexia. Steve realizes that his overweight girlfriend is the root of his father's problems, and he has to make a hard choice in an effort to save his father's life.

Stan loses his confidence, and his job, when a car salesman gets the best of him in a negotiation. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve set up a makeshift drive-in to try to get to first base with popular schoolgirls.

Stan has his heart set on speaking at the Republican National Convention on behalf of the Langley chapter, but when they pass him up for another candidate, he accepts the only endorsement he gets from the local chapter of Gay Republicans. While the people around him disapprove of his new lifestyle choice, Stan decides to follow his heart to speak on their behalf.

After Francine tells Stan she's looking for excitement in their marriage, Stan gets in the driver's seat and becomes involved in drag racing to spice things up. Meanwhile, Hayley breaks up with her boyfriend, Jeff, who is emotionally crushed until he joins Steve's world of online gaming. When Hayley finds out, she tries to sabotage their fun.

When Steve's new relationship with his girlfriend gives Francine empty nest syndrome, she tries to convince Stan to have another baby. Meanwhile, Roger tries to enroll in college with Haley in order to experience college life, but while Roger ends up teaching the class, Haley finds a new crush in her classmate Ethan (Elijah Woods), who turns out to be far from normal.

When Francine discovers Stan's secret, decades-old passion for competitive figure skating, she decides to be supportive and becomes his pairs partner until Stan's competitive nature gets the best of him and he ditches her for a new partner. Meanwhile, Steve's classmate Snot finds new respect among his peers when he parades his mail-order bride around the playground.

When Roger helps Steve see that his father isn't as smart as he always believed, the power-hungry pair set their sights on fame and fortune in New York City. It doesn't take long for Roger to lose everything on Wall Street, and Steve contemplates prostitution after Jon Stewart shoots down his comedy routine. Meanwhile, the rest of the family is certain that the two have just run away to the tree house, so when it explodes in a lightning storm, they are devastated, but console themselves with Steve's college fund.

When an injunction prevents Langley Falls from lighting their annual Christmas tree, Stan blames secular non-believers for ruining his favorite holiday. With Stan's holiday spirit at an all-time low, the Ghost of Christmas Past visits him and tries to show him the true meaning of Christmas. However, Stan is convinced that Christmas can be saved by changing the outcome of Vietnam, but finds that changing the past only dramatically changes the future.

When Stan enters an essay contest to have his personal hero, President Bush, come over for dinner, he is overcome with joy when the President arrives at his doorstep. However, not everyone in the Smith family shares Stan's excitement. Hayley tries to drill President Bush on the Iraq war, and Steve and Roger attempt to convince him that they've found Osama Bin Laden, but instead get him drunk. Stan tries to save the President from public humiliation, while Hayley revels in his fall from glory.

When Stan feels like he's not climbing the ladder fast enough at work, he turns to his lifelong ambition of making festive teddy bears. However, when he realizes that making a quick profit takes a lot of work, he resorts to using illegal aliens as cheap labor. Meanwhile, Hayley sees her father's new business model as an atrocity and takes matters into her own hands by calling Uncle Sam.

When Roger is rejected by Steve, who seems to be over him, Roger heads out in search of a new human companion. But when this new friend starts to abuse Roger and the relationship turns into a lot of excuses and sorry's, Steve and Hayley scheme to get Roger out of the bad relationship and back home where he belongs. Meanwhile, Stan tours the Mr. Pibb factory and meets the man himself.

While researching a paper about George Washington Carver in celebration of Black History Month, Steve uncovers a conspiracy that's been going on since the Civil War. When the curator of the Smithsonian Peanut Museum reaches out to tell Steve the truth, he's mysteriously murdered, and Steve and Stan are tracked by a secret society that will stop at nothing to keep this scandalous secret of American history.

Stan arrives late to a CIA nuclear drill and thinks it's real. He decides to move the family into the mountains to survive the apocalypse. Even though he realizes his error, he begins to enjoy the attention that he gets from the family so much that he doesn't tell them the truth. However, when the family meets a mountain man and learns the truth, Stan has some explaining to do.

Stan sets Bullock up on a date with one of Francine's friends. Fearing that Francine will be right about the outcome of the date, Stan goes to great lengths to make sure it goes well by getting everyone drunk. Unfortunately, Bullock accidentally kills the woman, to which Stan frames Francine for the murder in order to keep her from asking so many questions.

After Stan discovers that Francine has a secret sex garden, he feels like their marriage may be crumbling. Looking to rekindle their romance, Francine asks for a divorce so that Stan can experience life as a bachelor again, and both learn a valuable lesson in love. Meanwhile, addicted to an energy drink, Steve finds himself panhandling in the streets to support his new habit.

When Stan brings home CIA equipment designed to eavesdrop on conversations, he finds out that his neighbors don't think too highly of him. In retaliation, Stan has the entire neighborhood evicted so that he can live free of any criticism. However, when an unexpected friend comes to his rescue, he realizes that gossip is a two-way street.

After Stan is prosecuted for sending contaminated cattle to a slaughterhouse, he says that it began as a quest to make a man out of Steve. Meanwhile, Roger sparks a cat fight between Francine and Hayley, for reasons of his own.

Roger becomes a bounty hunter, and he and Stan race cross-country to turn in Jeff, who is wanted for smuggling pot into Florida.

Francine demands that Stan take the family on a vacation after she learns all of their previous vacations never actually happened: The CIA had planted artificial memories of the "vacations" in their brains so Stan could ditch them. Meanwhile, Roger wants to be a thespian.

After Stan punches a male meter maid during a disagreement over a parking ticket, a judge sentences him to two weeks of community service--as a meter maid. Meanwhile, Hayley poses in the nude for an art class, where one of the artists turns out to be Roger.

Stan prays for a friend and one is provided: a guy named Brett who's like him in every way but one--he's an atheist. So Stan has some evangelizing to do. Meanwhile, Steve is accepted into wizardry school.

Stan seeks out Francine's birth parents because her visiting adoptive parents annoy him so much. But they don't annoy Steve, especially after they give him fireworks.

Stan, who had Hayley brainwashed because he wanted her to be a sleeper CIA agent, activates her and orders her to marry a senator's son. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve decide to open a detective agency like the ones in the '70s TV shows they have been watching.

Although Stan is a veteran CIA agent, it turns out that he has never killed anyone, so three of his buddies from the agency (and Roger) take him out so he can bag his "first kill."

Terry and Greg, the Smiths' gay neighbors, want to have a baby, and Francine offers to be their surrogate. Not surprisingly, Stan objects. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger play a practical joke on Klaus, who vows revenge.

Stan dies on Christmas Eve while trying to find a perfect Christmas tree, then wreaks havoc in heaven (and limbo) trying to return to Earth to save his family--who were dragged along on his quest--from freezing to death in the woods.

Stan and Francine give the constantly nasty Roger an ultimatum: Be nice or ship out. Meanwhile, Klaus and Hayley play truth or dare, and Steve decides to become a backup dancer.

A James Bond spoof casts Stan as a 007-type agent assigned by B (Bullock) to infiltrate the set of a movie producer named TchochkieSchmear (Klaus), who's in cahoots with the diabolical villain Tearjerker (Roger). Their plan? To kill everyone in the world by making movies so sad, people will cry themselves to death.

When Stan's mom gets dumped by yet another boyfriend, she comes running to Stan for support, which he willingly provides (yet again). Francine, feeling threatened, seeks to loosen this umbilical cord, with Roger's help. Meanwhile, Klaus inadvertently gives Steve a fish disease called "ick."

Francine wants Stan to open up emotionally, and after a few sessions with "pretend psychiatrist" Roger, he's more touchy-feely than she can handle. Meanwhile, Hayley kills the queen bee from Steve's science project, and he vows vengeance.

Stan hunts for an ex-KGB agent but can't find him--until he moves in next door. And Steve is building a rocket for a school science project, but can't get it to work--until he gets some help from his new next-door neighbor. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus head off on a European vacation.

After outing himself as an alien, Roger (in disguise) finagles his way into being appointed the CIA's chief alien hunter to take advantage of a lavish expense account--while coming up just short in attempts to catch himself. Meanwhile, Francine shocks her family by displaying a prejudice they never knew she had.

After almost dying in a car crash, Stan decides that he must do something important with his life, so he digs for the gold he claims Iran-Contra figure Oliver North buried beneath his house. Meanwhile, Roger poses as a sexually provocative female office worker, hoping he'll be harassed so he can sue over it.

Francine is out of town, giving Roger an opportunity to host spring break at the Smith house for visiting college students, one of whom becomes the straying Stan's "spring-break buddy." Meanwhile, cable music-channel host Carmen Selectra decides she wants to make Steve her sexual conquest.

It's Roger's 1600th birthday, but the Smiths are too freaked out by Steve's impending puberty to celebrate. So Roger decides to make his own birthday fun.

Roger plays detective to track down a case of what he suspects is identity theft. Meanwhile, the Smith family gets sucked into a mean game of Simon Says.

Bullock makes Stan his "No. 1" at the CIA, a promotion that makes the furious Francine the "No. 1" babysitter for Bullock's baby son. Bullock needs someone to watch the kid because his wife's been kidnapped by Iraqi insurgents.

Stan learns that Francine was engaged to another man before she met him, and tracks the guy down to size him up. Meanwhile, Steve can't stay away from a schizophrenic cat that literally has nine lives.

Steve plots revenge after girlfriend Debbie loses a very dirty election for class president. But it backfires badly.

Hayley goes on a rampage after her boyfriend breaks up with her, but she calms down when she begins dating Stan's CIA body double, Bill. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger get jobs separating male and female chicks at a Chinatown hatchery.

Stan emcees a CIA telethon to raise funds for the agency's torture budget after Congress slashed it. But Roger is out to sabotage it because Stan stole the idea for it from him.

When Steve suffers indignities in school because of the back brace he must wear for his scoliosis, Stan confides in him that he wears a wig to cover his baldness. Meanwhile, Roger invites both Francine and Hayley to a posh spa even though he has only two passes.

Stan is ecstatic--and energetic--when a coworker gives him pills that allow him to stay up all night.

The Smiths catch Roger spending time with another family--and it turns out that he has been a family "cheater" for decades.

When Langley Falls bans trans fats, Stan and Steve become smugglers. Meanwhile, Klaus gets word that he has received an inheritance but can't collect it because the CIA has turned him into a fish.

When Stan forgets to pick up grenadine at the grocery store, Roger goes ballistic and vows to get him back by taking over a project close to his heart--the Homeowner’s Association.

Steve connects with his ne'er-do-well paternal grandfather, whom Stan despises for many reasons, not the least of which is that he never taught him to ride a bike. Meanwhile, Hayley must find an internship quickly, so Roger hires her to tend his bar.

Steve and his friends sabotage a stuck-up kid's bar mitzvah after the kid hits on Steve's girlfriend, Debbie. But when Snot is wrongly accused of stealing the kid's bar-mitzvah money, his own bar mitzvah is put in jeopardy.

Stan is kidnapped in Colombia, but the real trouble begins after he's released and returns home. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger play detective duo "Wheels and the Legman."

Steve and Stan, who don't have much in common, try to bond on a road trip to Albuquerque in search of a pair of the distinctive DeLorean doors to complete a car that Stan has been building. Meanwhile, Roger, Hayley and Francine decide to have an adventure of their own, but they can't decide what to do.

Steve joins a football team to please Stan, who then takes over as coach and gives Steve the boot because he isn't good enough. Meanwhile, Francine and Hayley vie for a blue ribbon at the county fair.

Roger declares that he was sent to Earth to be "the decider" of humanity's fate, and Stan challenges him on it.

Francine and Stan swap spouses with their gay neighbours Terry and Greg when Terry's dad, a former football player who doesn't know that his son is gay, arrives for a visit. Meanwhile, Steve goes on a drunken bender.

Stan leaves Francine at home to go out with the boys, but guys' night out goes from wild to reckless when Stan finds himself in one compromising situation after another. Meanwhile, Roger and Hayley use their charm and looks to attract a frat boy.

When Steve is selected to sing the national anthem at the Langley Falls Veterans' Day celebration, he gets some heat from Stan who doesn't think he's ready for such an undertaking. Unimpressed with Steve's vocal talents, Stan decides Steve needs to experience real war in order to sing about our country's military prowess. But things quickly go south when Roger gets involved and Steve goes bananas.

In order to get a promotion at work, Stan has to convince the dictator of Isla Island to sign a treaty. Stan meets the general and accidentally kills him and has Roger pose as the leader of the small island nation. Meanwhile, Steve and Snot become competitive to see who can get farther with the other’s mom.

Steve is left home as the family plan a trip to Boston hoping to locate a college for Hayley. When his friends arrive they convince him to break the rules, resulting in them finding the controls to a military drone in Stan's study. Meanwhile, after Stan leaves the plane to return home for his painkillers, Roger changes disguise from a little girl to a Stan constume so he can get served alcohol. When an air marshal notices that the girl is missing, he grounds the plane and investigates.

Francine teaches Roger to be self-sufficient so he can get his own place; at camp, Steve and his friends fall prey to a scheme.

Steve must become the man of the house when Stan re-lives his childhood.

Upset that Francine has let herself go, Stan takes drastic measures when she asks him to renew their wedding vows.

When Hayley goes to a My Morning Jacket concert against Stan’s wishes, he crashes the show to bring her back home, but when he hears their music for the first time, it calls to him and he’s smitten. Stan becomes obsessed with the band and decides to follow them on the road as a groupie.

Upset that Hayley no longer wants his advice, Stan decides to prove that she is missing out on his sage counseling. After meeting a stripper on an important CIA mission, Stan takes it upon himself to improve her life and show Hayley that his advice works. But when he opens a new business, hoping to prove Hayley wrong, he finds himself dancing for cash to cover up his failures.

When the Smith family goes to church on Christmas Day, Stan is furious when he can’t get a good seat. While Francine tries to ease his frustration, a moment of divine intervention occurs. Upset that he has been left on earth with Francine during the ultimate fight between good and evil, Stan ditches his wife to get into the pearly gates of heaven, but when Francine is kidnapped, Stan fights to get her back.

When Stan gets told by Francine to get rid of his gas-guzzling SUV, he and Roger hatch up a plan at the local horse track to avoid losing his car. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends help an old friend.

Stan puts down liberal social programs because he thinks they are a waste of money and gives Francine a hard time for lending a helping hand at the local homeless shelter. When Stan develops a nasty addiction and needs help, he suddenly has a change of heart.

Stan gives Francine "love coupons" for Valentine's Day, but refuses to honor them once he becomes preoccupied with his very own CIA cyborg. Meanwhile, Roger helps Steve and his friends remake a classic '80s movie.

When Stan admits that his heroes include the 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team, Roger confesses that he played on the team; Reginald tries to win over Hayley by taking her to a concert.

After Roger and Francine are victims of a mugging, Roger joins the police academy so he can learn how to defend himself and his loved ones (including Stan and Steve), but he falls in with a corrupt cop (guest voice Cannavale) who leads him astray. Meanwhile, Hayley's new friendship threatens her long-term relationship. Chaz kidnaps and leaves Stan tied up and tape-gagged. Meanwhile, Roger kills Chaz and rescues Stan, who makes his boss happy.

When Roger and Francine go wine-tasting, Roger plants a big kiss on Francine in a drunken moment. Francine decides to tell Stan about this incident, but when they sit down to talk, Roger convinces Stan that Francine started it all.

Roger studies crime scene photography; Stan bullies Steve in hopes of toughening him up.

In preparation for a neighborhood pool party, Stan tells his family to get in tip-top shape. But when an accident ruins the Smith family name, a humiliated Stan fakes his family’s deaths and moves everyone out of Langley Falls to escape his shame

It’s Roger’s birthday, and he begs to be roasted, but when he ends up devastated by the jokes, he vows to pull his life together. Things take a turn for the worse when Roger takes it one step too far, causing the Smith family to go on the run

Stan offers a reward to the person who can stop Hayley and her old boyfriend from eloping.

Francine and Stan compare parenting skills after Stan creates a clone of Steve; Roger searches for the missing bride and groom.

Wanting to have the scariest haunted house on the block, Stan comes up with a ''killer'' setup; Steve competes to win the heart of his overprotective friend's younger sister.

Stan is ecstatic when Roger offers to help him live out his lifelong dream of opening a restaurant to rival his favorite childhood haunt - until their different visions for what the eatery should be cause havoc. Meanwhile, Steve meets Ashley, the new girl in school who invites him over while her parents are out of town.

After an argument between Stan and Francine breaks out, Stan suggests they go see a counselor, who hypnotizes Francine and reawakens her lifelong dream of being a comedian. Meanwhile, back in Langley Falls, Steve brings home a potential love interest for Klaus.

It’s Thanksgiving in Langley Falls, and as usual, Stan invites his half-brother, Rusty, over to show off his cornucopia of wealth and good fortune. But when Stan finds out that Rusty is far wealthier than he led on, Stan tries to take from Rusty what he feels is rightfully his. Things don’t go well, and the Smith family nearly loses it all.

If there’s one thing that Stan Smith loves, it’s a good jury trial. He anxiously awaits his annual jury summons. But when Roger is the defendant in the trial where Stan is the foreman, he is finally in a position to make Roger accountable for his misdeeds. Meanwhile, Jeff and Hayley move in with the Smiths, and Francine tries to get Jeff to clean up his act.

Despite Francine's warning, Stan gives Steve a gun for Christmas; Steve accidentally shoots Santa.

When Roger releases lethal gas into the Smith residence, the family moves into a hotel while the fumes clear.

Stan and Francine have trouble keeping up with a younger couple's lifestyle.

With a flair for the dramatic, Roger invites Stan to attend one of his acting classes. However, tempers flare when they both audition for the same role, leaving them to duke it out for top dog. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends get into a pillow fight when they try to plan the greatest slumber party ever.

After an argument with Stan, Roger moves out of the house and is subsequently replaced. Meanwhile, Steve acquires a new job at Pearl Bailey High School.

When Steve challenges Stan for family dominance, Stan does everything he can to prove to Steve that he is the alpha male of the Smith house. Meanwhile, Hayley and Jeff seek marriage counseling when the honeymoon phase wears off.

In an attempt to advance in the CIA, Stan enrolls Steve in the same private school as Senator Buckingham's daughter. After Steve quits and joins a Latina street gang, Roger fills in & things are going well until Roger accidentally sells the senator’s daughter to a drug lord.

When Steve has trouble crossing over into the "cool kids" social circle, Klaus and Roger place their bets to see how quickly Roger can make him cool. Everything they try backfires until Steve becomes the in-crowds designated driver. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine take turns pranking each other.

After Snot professes his love for Hayley and gets shot down, Steve and Roger devise a plan to cheer him up. Roger dresses up as Steve’s cousin from New Jersey, Jenny Fromdabloc, and Snot falls hard for her. Meanwhile, Stan wants to live like a gentleman of the 1960s, complete with dark suits and dry martinis.

Stan and Francine fight over how to redecorate the house. It goes so far that they split the house down the middle and try to live without each other. Meanwhile, Principal Lewis discovers a talent of Barry.

Francine gets a job at Stan’s office, which cramps Stan’s style and his ability to flirt with co-workers. When Francine retaliates with a little flirting of her own, war breaks out at work.

Bonding with Steve at the zoo causes Stan to lose Steve in the gorilla cage.

Stressed out by his family and his obligations, Stan decides to buy a hot tub to relieve his stress, but gets into hot water when he finds out the hot tub is evil.

When a hurricane hits Langley Falls, the Smiths fight like mad to survive in their home. The crossover starts on The Cleveland Show S03E02 The Hurricane (I) and Family Guy S10E02 Seahorse Seashell Party (II).

Roger becomes Steve's legal guardian, but gets a little overzealous in the parenting department when he gets the principal fired. After getting beat up by the other teachers at the school, Steve decides to run away. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine attempt to make waves after discovering that their vacation at the biggest water park in the world fails to get their hearts pumping.

When Stan realizes that he might never fulfill his dream of becoming a Best Man, he convinces his last single friend, Principal Lewis to marry the school’s Superintendent and to choose him as his Best Man. Stan invites Lewis’ old friend from prison to the wedding, only to discover a secret that could prevent the wedding from happening at all. Meanwhile, Roger finds the perfect pair of shorts, and an encounter with Ricky Martin makes him question his self-confidence.

Stan makes a desperate attempt to bond with his son by creating a busty blonde bombshell.

When Stan runs into his former crush from CIA boot camp, his affection for her resurfaces, which drives Francine into a jealous frenzy. By including Roger in her plan for revenge, Francine accidentally leads him straight into the arms of a dangerous alien hunter. Meanwhile, Steve is struck with good luck, when he accidentally wears Hayley’s panties to school.

Father Donovan holds a Christmas play at the mall and casts Stan as Santa Claus and Roger as Jesus. But after the two get in a fight and cause a scene, Stan is kicked out of the church. Meanwhile, Hayley and Jeff adopt a child who turns out to be possessed.

When Steve tries to prove himself as a macho man to Stan, he follows in Roger's footsteps and tries to change himself from the outside in with a superhero persona. Meanwhile, Francine is going through an identity crisis of her own when she receives surprising news that could change the family forever.

When Stan finally has enough money to afford a membership at the golf club he has worked at for the past thirty summers, his hard work and perseverance prove to be futile when the club gives a membership to Steve first. However, things are not all what they seem when Stan realizes who the club owner really is.

Stan joins Roger and Steve's fictional detective agency, but he ruins the fun by being extremely incompetent at his "job." Roger demands that Steve fire Stan, but Steve cannot bring himself to do it and ends up lying to Roger. Things take a turn for the worse when Stan is kidnapped, and Steve must tell Roger the truth.

When Stan is overly enthusiastic about his hatred for old people, a hex is placed on him that turns him into a frail, old man. Meanwhile, Roger takes Francine on a road trip to a dance competition, but she soon finds out it's not what she bargained for.

When Barry (guest voice Eddie Kay Thomas) threatens Stan's old high school wrestling record, Stan enlists Roger to beat Barry and defend his small claim to fame. However, Stan is caught off-guard when Roger, not Barry, is actually the threat to Stan's record.

Roger acts as the family therapist as his alter-ego "Dr. Penguin" until he is sent out to fight the war in Iraq. Klaus decides to take Roger's role while he is away, but not without major ruckus being caused.

Despite Stan's objections, Francine buys Steve the dog he has always wanted. However, when the dog suffers a horrific accident, Stan refuses to take the pup off life support because of a traumatic childhood incident.

After losing patience with Hayley and Jeff for their freeloading ways, Stan bets the young couple that he and Francine can live on minimum wage for a month. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger embark on a mission to test drive the car of their dreams.

Stan fears he may not be Hayley's real father, so he goes back in time to find the truth. In doing so, he disrupts the past and must save the future.

Roger rediscovers one of personas, Ricky Spanish, and remembers why he's the most hated person in Langley Falls. Meanwhile, the child Stan and Francine sponsored in Africa suddenly shows up on their doorstep.

When Stan catches Steve playing imaginary games with his toys, he decides to take his son down to Mexico to help him become a man. But the trip takes a turn for the worse when Stan and Steve are kidnapped by a drug cartel, and it’s up to Steve to break himself and Stan out of captivity.

When Roger hires Hayley as a singer in his new bar, he becomes enthralled by her voice; Stan tries to prove his masculinity by negotiating a good deal on a new car.

During the Smith family's tropical vacation, Stan is ordered to kill the activities director at their resort; Jeff and Hayley try to rekindle their romance.

Francine thinks Stan spends too much time with his friends; a boy band recruits Steve and his friends for a music video.

When Stan invites his recently widowed mother to move in, she and Roger fall in love and wed; Steve and his friends find a lost movie script.

When Stan decides that Snot isn't cool enough to be Steve's best friend, he tries to separate them by staging a shooting at an ice cream parlor.

When Steve's baby sitter is unavailable, Stan and Francine decide to leave him with Hayley; Steve sneaks out to a party to prove he's not a goody-goody.

A talk show reveals that Francine was the toddler who, famously, was rescued from a well by a firefighter; Francine makes a discovery when she falls down the well on the anniversary of her rescue; Stan and Roger come up with a business idea.

The Smiths get drunk at Roger's Mardi Gras party and make a pact with Bullock; Roger tries to find the person who left a pastie in the attic.

Francine regrets deciding to teach Roger the value of hard work; Steve interviews Stan for a school project.

When Francine invites Stan's father to a party, a dark secret about the Smith family's past is revealed.

Roger announces that Max Jets, a character who showers the Smith family with money, is making a return; a gold-digging waitress romances Max and threatens the family's inheritance.

Roger pretends to be Jeff's imaginary friend so he can roam around the house without a disguise; when Jeff realizes Roger is an alien, Stan issues an ultimatum -- either Roger or Jeff must be killed; Steve becomes insecure about his body.

When Black Villain shoots Stan's new wife, Sexpun Tocome, on their honeymoon, Stan teams up with his nemesis to take him down.

Francine tries to rig the school spelling bee so that Steve will win; Stan and Roger try to rush Hayley's grieving process so she will be available to judge their badminton game.

Francine tries to get Stan to spice up their sex life; Hayley tries to get back into dating and accepts a date with Snot.

When Stan gets amnesia, Francine tries to turn him into her ideal husband; Steve is drawn into the corrupt side of Roger's paper route business.

Stan is shocked when he is told that Deputy Director Bullock is showing early signs of dementia and needs his memory erased; Roger hires an old friend to help Steve with a bully at school.

Jeff must prove his love for Hayley to Emperor Zing in order to find his way home from the spaceship that abducted him.

When Stan refuses to switch Klaus back into his original body, he steals Stan's body; Roger builds a gym in the attic.

Thwarted in their efforts to secure dates for the upcoming high school prom, Steve and Snot turn to the CIA’s cloning machine to churn out two willing ladies. But, when the device produces two uber-fast-growing newborn babies, the boys must break out their fathering skills to ready them in time for prom night. Meanwhile, Stan takes home the CIA’s cloned pet, Daren the Dodo, with disastrous consequences.

Francine's "Poltergasm" starts to haunt the Smith household when she is unsatisfied by Stan in the sack, and Roger must conjure a medium named Zelda Rubinstein to help eliminate the ghost. Meanwhile, Hayley introduces her new boy-toy, Mauricio to the family.

Steve decides to prove his manhood by accompanying Stan and his CIA cronies on their annual hunting excursion. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus undertake a cross-country trek.

In a desperate attempt to show Steve that she's still a "cool" mom, Francine teaches him a vast array of shoplifting techniques to try out at the local mall. B when their attempt to pull off the ultimate heist at "The Gash" goes awry, Steve is captured and sent to a Venezuelan sweatshop. Meanwhile, Roger, Hayley and Klaus form Langley Falls' first Russian Balalaika trio.

Stan's plans for a perfect Thanksgiving watching football in his underwear are thwarted when Francine invites her adoptive parents to join them for the holiday.

Determined to get Snot to confront his emotions after his father passes away, Steve and friends embark on an epic cross-country road trip to the funeral. But Steve's commitment to his friend wavers when he falls for a Pixie Dream Girl along the way. Meanwhile, Stan and Roger invent an automatic cake-cutter for the Home Shopping Network, but their partnership is tested when they only make a "verbal agreement" to split the profits.

In this “Breaking Bad” parody, Hayley tries to fit in with a popular group of her former high school friends and, in the process, discovers Steve has an amazing ability to create incredibly realistic fake IDs. Sensing a business opportunity, Hayley builds out Steve’s operation, but they don’t count on having to deal with the other kingpin of the Langley Falls fake ID game: Kevin Ramage (Roger in disguise).

When Steve starts acting like a spoiled brat during the holidays, Stan takes him to see his incarcerated Grandpa Jack, who tells him the story of how he caught Minstrel Krampus, a legendary demon who punishes naughty children on Christmas. Stan decides that releasing Krampus is the only way to straighten out Steve's attitude. But when Krampus kidnaps Steve, it's up to Stan and Roger to get him back. Meanwhile, Hayley gets a job at the airport, but quickly realizes that she might not be cut out for customer service.

Roger suffers a horrific car crash as he tries to take a picture of his crotch on a traffic speed cam. After waking up from a coma, he starts to have eerie visions of the future, and saves the Smiths from a terrible fire. But, Roger's abuse of his newfound powers soon draws the ire of his fellow family members and the Smiths must learn to cope with the uncertainty of the future.

Francine tries to relive the Smith kids' childhood by taking a group trip to the "Familyland" theme park that ends up being anything but family-friendly.

Stan mixes up his nighttime routine after his 100th kill, but mistakenly unleashes a "good" Stan in his sleep - Jekyll & Hyde-style - who's hell-bent on pursuing all the good deeds that real Stan would never consider, and stopping him from ever killing again.

Roger forges a radical plan to help Steve date the hot girl at school. Roger will switch faces with Steve "Face/Off"-style, seduce her, then tag Steve back in after she's fallen for him. But, Roger soon decides he may actually want to keep her for himself. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine become "Charlie's Angels"-type airline stewardesses to thwart an evil plan by Mark Cuban who wants to blow up the sun.

Stan is frustrated that Steve and his friends never play outside, but Francine refuses to let Stan take the kids to the woods for some outdoor fun. Of course, Stan finds a loophole, by drugging the kids and putting them on the CIA's holodeck, which, naturally, goes awry. Meanwhile, Hayley buys Roger's home star on the International Star Registry and claims she's now his queen.

Stan tries an experimental pill from the CIA and turns into a girl. Meanwhile, Klaus and Roger start a business selling Stan's suits as he no longer needs them as a female.

Stan attempts to infiltrate the "Occupy" movement, based on CIA intelligence that a leftist cell is planning a terrorist attack. But when he's captured and returned home by a group of radicals, Hayley suspects her father may have been "turned".

Stan fears that Hayley has no life skills so he forces her to take a job as a bartender in Roger's attic bar but, when Bullock becomes Hayley's best customer, Stan realizes that he can use his daughter's knowledge to get ahead at work.

Stan's co-workers at the CIA teach him about "rubbernecking," the art of checking out other women on the sly, away from the gaze of their wives. But when Stan causes a massive accident in an attempt to take a picture of an attractive jogger, he's interviewed by an intimidating insurance inspector who may rat out Stan to Francine. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus spill wine on the Smiths' brand new couch, and vow never to tell the other family members by sitting on the stained spot for the rest of their lives.

Stan is fired from the CIA in a round of budget cuts, but since his 20 years of work experience are classified and hidden from his "permanent record", the only job he's able to land is at the local grocery store where Steve is the manager. Meanwhile, Roger bets an annoying coffee shop musician that he can outplay him in one week. To accomplish his goal, he enters into a Faustian bargain with Lorenzo, a guitar-instructing infomercial host.

Hayley starts an internship at a local news station working for a Nancy Grace-type reporter, who happens to be Roger in disguise.

Hayley, still heartbroken over Jeff’s abduction, meets millionaire Matt Davis, who begins to help her move forward, until Steve and Snot discover that Jeff’s alive and trying to make it back to her.

Roger is forced to sell his beloved attic bar to a restaurant chain after suffering a heart attack, and a sexy new next-door neighbor promises to take Steve and his friends’ virginity in return for housework.

Greg and Terry decide to adopt a 10-year-old Russian boy named Michael. At a party celebrating the decision, Roger is jealous of Greg and Terry's fabulous lifestyle of culture and sophistication. Roger rejects the Smith family as trashy and impersonates Michael, successfully integrating into his new home.

Roger and Francine discover an alien in the woods, and Roger capriciously has a one-night relationship with her before being fed up with her quirks. He tries to get rid of her by calling the CIA, but then realizes that he can’t go through with it.

When her efforts to save the planet prove hopeless, Hayley decides that she might get more attention if she becomes a blonde. Meanwhile, Stan and Steve go on a mission to find a new home for the Smiths.

When Bullock sends a drone to do the job Stan and his colleagues are supposed to do, Stan is determined to prove that humans are better than robots. Meanwhile, Francine and the rest of the family participate in a slow motion race against one another in the living room.

Steve and Snot are fed up with being bullied. When they enroll in a karate class, Snot is brainwashed by the sensei, and it's Steve's mission to get him back. Meanwhile, Klaus develops a horrible odor and is forced to be an outside pet.

When the CIA is forced to make cutbacks and go on furlough, Stan volunteers to take a position as a college campus security guard. Meanwhile, Roger opens a bed and breakfast to boost the family's income.

When Francine's sister Gwen comes to town, Hayley suspects she is up to no good. Meanwhile, Stan teaches Steve the art of hugging Aunt Gwen, and Klaus shadows Roger's dramatic comments.

When Stan wishes he could have Principal Lewis' carefree, single life, a la "It's a Wonderful Life," his wish comes true. In Stan's wish world, Principal Lewis has his family.

Hayley is dying to be on a roller derby team, but they only will let her play if her 'sister' Steve gets to play. Meanwhile, a magical carpenter visits Stan and Francine, and Roger runs the roller rink.

When Steve swears at Francine, she refuses to cook for him, and he becomes a successful chef, appearing on a popular morning show. Meanwhile, Stan thinks he can make people invisible by snapping his fingers.

Hayley gets a job and starts to fall for a co-worker. Meanwhile, Stan chauffers Steve and Francine to a Mother-Son dance.

While on vacation in Los Angeles, Stan joins the world of old Hollywood. Meanwhile, Roger kennel-trains Steve and Hayley.

Francine is up for an award for her lonely housewife novel, so the family heads to the Big Apple for the ceremony. Meanwhile, Stan and Hayley hang out with actor Robert Wuhl, and Steve and Roger recreate their Wheels and the Legman personas.

Stan is horrified when he sees a couple die in a car crash, and he goes to see a shrink. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus study for a wine tasting.

Jeff returns from space ... or does he? Meanwhile, Steve watches after Snot's hamster.

"American Dad" is sold to a Chinese businessman. Meanwhile, Stan has Francine committed to an insane asylum when he forgets their anniversary.

When Stan lies about his texting-and-driving accident, he takes a seizure medication and suffers from the side effects. Meanwhile, Roger helps Steve with his performance anxiety.

Stan sets out to stop a tree that he considers his father from being cut down. Steve realizes he's stopped growing and considers surgery.

Steve joins the high school water polo team to get girls. Meanwhile, Roger and Stan get a boat.

Hayley mentally regresses to a 6-year-old. Steve and his pals get a slow cooker.

Steve goes to work with Stan and discovers the N.S.A.. Hayley decides to let go of being a vegetarian and eat meat for one day.

Stan goes undercover as a surfer a la Point Break. Steve befriends a drifter, Hayley might be pregnant, and Roger wants the World Cup to be held in the backyard.

Stan gets Francine baseball tickets for her birthday but is upset when they have a horrible kiss on the kiss cam. Steve and Roger head to Nevada to help clean polluted water.

When Stan is given the task of putting together the CIA calendar, Hayley attempts to destroy it. Meanwhile, Roger gets a Discover card and fakes his death to get out of paying the enormous balance.

Roger becomes a teacher at Steve's school and gets involved with a class of underprivileged kids. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine visit a retirement home and Stan decides to stay.

Francine sets out to help news anchor Greg when he and Terry split up. Roger becomes obsessed with a fictional boy from an old game called Dream Phone.

Stan, tattooed and haunted, travels a barren Langley Falls alone. Meanwhile, a mysterious element known as "The Two Hundred" has reigned terror on the town and separated Stan from his family.

Steve and Snot alter their futures when they throw a party for the uncool kids. Meanwhile, Roger is disgruntled when a waitress doesn't compliment his order.

Roger loses his identity after becoming fascinated by a local dentist's wife. Meanwhile, Klaus throws a party when Stan and the kids are unable to move from being sore after working out.

When Stan is on a mission, Francine pretends she's a widow. Steve and his friends play wrestling and get beat up by Principal Lewis.

Francine joins in on Steve and his pals' live-action role-playing game. Stan opens a knock-off Seaworld in the house.

Stan loses his faith in religion after Steve questions everything in the Bible. He takes the family to Korea to investigate the rumors of a reinvented "Noah's Ark."

Everyone is separated after the ship explodes: Stan and Francine lose their memories and resort to primitive living on an island; Hayley and Jeff are rescued by the Navy and Jeff decides to enlist; and Roger and Steve try to survive on a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean.

When Roger breaks his ankle, Francine convinces Stan to let him play in his basketball league. Meanwhile, Steve sings a song that parodies R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet".

When Stan discovers a salt mine in the backyard, the Morton Salt Company wants to buy it. It turns out Steve is the rightful owner of the land, and he faces pressure from the family to sell.

Stan brings President Garfield back to life to teach Hayley about history; Steve joins the school newspaper.

Stan goes on a mission to find out who didn't bring a gift to the CIA's Secret Santa party; Steve poses as the good boyfriend for several female classmates.

Stan and Steve start bowling for more quality time together; Klaus holds a contest to see whether Roger or Hayley has the worse attention span.

To avoid a suicide mission, Stan must beat Bullock in a DJ battle; Jeff starts drinking psychedelic teas and builds an imaginary musical instrument with Roger's help.

Stan can't escape a recurring Father's Day.

Steve becomes a pilot.

Stan and Steve become sushi chefs.

A mold of Francine's vagina is displayed in a museum.

Stan is upset at the idea of becoming a grandfather after Hayley and Jeff announce they're trying to have a baby. Steve and Klaus join a drug gang after Steve decides to take being an uncle extra seriously.

Hayley experiences what pregnancy would be like after Roger agrees to give birth to Jeff so he can be human again. Snot's feelings are hurt when Steve secretly signs him up for a makeover.

The Smith family must rescue Steve after he is kidnapped and taken to the North Pole. There, Santa Claus is using children to mine for precious stones that he needs to perform an ancient ritual.

Francine becomes less attracted to Stan when he gets involved with slot car racing. Roger becomes a stewardess to perform comedy routines on the plane but is upset when another stewardess is funnier than him.

Steve and his friends take up witchcraft to gain power and popularity at school. Stan and Klaus become obsessed with remembering 90s bands.

Klaus gets transferred into the navigation system of Stan's car when Stan refuses to pay for life-saving surgery; Steve and his friends prank Roger, who then terrorizes them for revenge.

Francine steals from the CIA and pretends to be a super villain to incite Stan to be more seductive. Meanwhile, Roger tricks Hayley and Steve into trapping Jay Leno so he can take revenge.

Steve becomes the town pariah after he convinces the star quarterback of the Bazooka Sharks arena football team to stop playing. Meanwhile, Roger forces Hayley to become a cab driver to pay him back for her gambling debts.

Steve is upset when Snot threatens their summer camp fun by becoming a counselor-in-training. Meanwhile, Hayley and Jeff become suspicious of Roger when he organizes a "Burning Man" reenactment for their anniversary.

Roger runs off in disguise as a Julia Roberts character to a small town after Stan hurts his feelings; Steve plans a meeting when he finds out that Jeff and Barry have never met.

Stan becomes addicted to dying after Roger tricks him into thinking he had a heart attack; Klaus takes Steve to the Arizona State University for a college visit, where a fraternity hazes him.

The family competes on the reality show, The Bitchin' Race but after Stan and Hayley ditch the less-motivated Steve and Francine to team up, they end up in a Tunisian labor prison.

Francine reconnects with her birth family when she starts craving the experience of having a big family. Meanwhile, Stan becomes a Picker based on his obsession with American Pickers.

While having trouble communicating, Stan and Hayley team up to stop a terrorist plot to blow up the Bazooka Sharks arena. Meanwhile, Roger pretends to be an escort.

Roger and Klaus start having a secret affair after they accidentally end up on an online date together. Meanwhile, Steve tries to catch Hayley's pink eye to get out of doing a fitness test at school.

Stan and Steve open up their own father-son garbage business after Stan inherits his father's old truck. Meanwhile, Roger finds Hayley is a natural at bumper pool and brings her to play with the best player in town.

Roger becomes a marionette and injures other students to help Steve win the school talent show. Meanwhile, Stan, Hayley and Klaus start their own local honey business.

Stan becomes a wanted man, running from Roger the bounty hunter, and ends up in a town in need of a good guy to help Principal Lewis, Francine, Steve and Hayley.

Roger turns his attention to Steve's friend Snot who teaches him about Hanukkah, prompting him to convert to Judaism. Roger then decides to make Hanukkah more popular than Christmas by stealing Santa's powers, and becoming Schmanta Claus.

Francine becomes a conspiracy theorist when she finds out Stan has been shielding her from unhappy news; Klaus and Steve help Snot pimp out his basement.

Stan and Hayley compete in collecting data for the US Census; Klaus has Steve and his friends model for his new camera.

Steve tries to stop Roger after he joins a mysterious order of birds' egg thieves; Francine buys a new Italian sauce for the family.