Deluded Simon Porter dreams of passing his medical exam and becoming a doctor - but by starting at the bottom, and becoming the best porter the NHS has ever seen. All he has to do is survive a few months grafting in a hospital basement and try not to kill any of the patients. How hard can that be? Ed must work alongside the cynical, self-styled "Queen of the Porters" Frankie, and naïve nurse Lucy.

A top British cast - plus the legend that is Rutger Hauer - star in this original hospital comedy. Simon offers a kidney to a transplant patient in order to impress Lucy.

The Hospital Trust is running a fast-track management scheme, which Simon sees as a way to become the type of man nurse Lucy will give a second glance to.

A new Porter, Anthony, is in town as, unknown to Frankie and Simon, Tillman has headed off temporarily to a religious retreat. Anthony and Frankie have form and find themselves instantly in conflict when he tries to take a cut of her blackmarket perfume empire. Will he last the week? Meanwhile, Lucy presents Simon with a huge engagement ring – the ultimate nightmare, Dr McKenzie has proposed! Simon is a broken man but then secretly spots Dr McKenzie kissing another woman in the hospital. Things take a strange turn when it emerges the mystery woman is actually Dr McKenzie's sister…or is she?

Mr Pradeep spends a day as a Porter for charity. Simon's awe at his God-like power as a Surgeon unwittingly causes Mr Pradeep to have a fatal loss of nerve and hand in his notice just as he's about to operate on the husband of a Hospital Board director. Can Frankie and Simon get him back on track? Meanwhile, a woman dressed as an orc is admitted to the hospital with an extreme allergic reaction. No-one can work out why she continues to deteriorate until she comes into contact with Frankie and starts to scream. Does Frankie have a secret cosplay identity she's never shared with anyone at the hospital?

Simon's first night shift coincides with Halloween and an escaped prisoner roaming the wards - will he and Frankie survive?